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Dumb-ass idea dies deservedly

Rays Sternberg

The Tampa Bay Rays proposal to share the financially beleaguered Major League Baseball (MLB) franchise with the city of Montreal, a concept the organization has been committed to for years, has been officially squashed by Major League Baseball’s executive council. “We didn’t step in sooner because we had no idea that this was something being…

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Brandon resident kind of confused by popular new catchphrase

Phillip McGooley of Brandon does not understand the meaning behind a catchphrase that has become increasingly popular lately, nor how he’s expected to respond to it. “I get that it’s a positive thing, meant to show support for or perhaps inspire Brandon”, he said. “And that’s great. But are they talking about the town where…

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Rays also lose World Series in parallel universe

Parallel Universe Kevin Cash

The Tampa Bay Rays lost 3-1 to the Brooklyn Dodgers in Game 6 of the alternate 2020 World Series, ending their bid for an otherworld championship in Blixxarp-7, a hypothetical self-contained plane of existence, co-existing with our own. In Blixxarp-7, events and objects closely mirror those that we consider to be reality in this dimension,…

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Rays New Stadium Approved

Rays New Stadium Approved The Tampa Bay area finally has an approved plan for a new baseball stadium. The stadium will be an iconic and unique floating stadium on Tampa Bay. The plan was announced this morning at a press conference at Major League Baseball’s headquarters. Sports fans all over the Bay Area are breathing…

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Tampa sells soul for new Rays stadium

Tampa sells its soul for new stadium

In a wildly fictional series of events, the city of Tampa collectively sold their souls in exchange for a new state-of-the-art Rays stadium, to be built by 2028, centrally located between downtown and Ybor. Through witchcraft and a combination of dark magic spells, local government officials were able to conjure a portal to the underworld,…

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Rays Announce New Stadium in North Korea

Tampa – St Petersburg- Thursday, 1.3.2019 The Tampa Bay Ray’s have officially signed a deal to transfer their franchise to Pyongyang, North Korea, after a lucrative deal was offered by the foreign government.  “Nobody really cared about us here, so we figured ‘why not?’” Said Craig Bunt, Spokesman for the team. “Yea, people just kind…

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