Technology
Clearwater man pulling all kinds of hot chicks via game on his phone
Jay Bagre of Clearwater is attracting a lot of attention from beautiful women because he plays the popular game “Words With Friends” on his phone. “It’s unbelievable! All these beautiful women reaching out to me through this game because of my vocabulary skills”, he said. “That extra year of English for Academic Purposes I took…
Read MoreTampa gamer surprised to learn John Madden was a real person
11-year-old Dieter Duckworth of Tampa was shocked and saddened by the news that NFL Hall of Fame coach and media personality John Madden died, mostly because he had no idea that the video games he loves so much were named after a living person. “That was an actual guy? Seriously?”, Duckworth said upon learning this…
Read MoreRogue pedestrian crosswalk sign responds to commands
The newly installed pedestrian crosswalk sign at the intersection of Morgan Street and Channelside Drive in downtown Tampa actually responds when the “push to cross” button is pressed… for now. “What?!? No!! That’s impossible!” said Tampa Director of Pedestrian Foot Traffic Jonathan Chillbrain. “Those buttons are supposed to pacify people waiting to cross streets, thinking…
Read MoreGulfport lady cherishes new e-friend
Diane Wooster of Gulfport has made a new friend via an email she received from the internet. “I had never even met learnto@win.thehealthyfoodstuff.com but they contacted me completely out of the blue and offered me a chance to win a $500 gift card”, she said. “Isn’t that just the nicest thing you’ve ever heard of?”…
Read MoreMacDill Air Force Base assigned to temporary duty in outer space
Tampa’s MacDill Air Force Base, home of the 6th Air Refueling Wing, has been attached temporarily to the United States Space Force and is currently orbiting 254 miles above the Earth. Senior Airman (SrA) Bowie Shanman of the 6th Air Refueling Wing Public Affairs Office said, “Since we don’t have any Raymond James Stadium flyovers…
Read MoreBrooksville influencer launches social media platform for racists
Todd Barbersack of Brooksville is a social media influencer and app designer, who believes he has invented what will be the next big thing in social media. He says, “It’s called MinstrelGram and it’s designed to celebrate a sadly unappreciated and forgotten form of very specific American entertainment: white people putting on blackface make-up to…
Read More‘Baby Shark’ becomes most viewed YouTube video of all time, surpassing ‘Tampa Dad Nutshot’
Aficionados of testicular mishaps documented on home video consider the video a masterpiece.
Read MoreSafety Harbor businessman hires Hackers
Safety Harbor businessman , Wilbur Harrington, recently read an article about computer passwords. He had never realized how easy they were to hack. If you have 13 characters uppercase, lowercase, numbers, punctuations and symbols the average hacker can break your password in under a minute. Harrington pondered this and thought, “my passwords only have a…
Read MoreJoe Redner to purchase TikTok
Tampa business owner, free-speech advocate and frequent lawsuit participant Joe Redner will purchase TikTok, the controversial video-sharing social networking service. A US ban on downloads and updates of TikTok, as well as WeChat, was set to take effect tomorrow, in accordance with an executive order issued by President Trump. “I have dedicated my entire life…
Read MoreVideo game ad character looking for new career
An anonymous avatar who appears in advertisements for a video game is frustrated with his job and wants to explore new opportunities. “It seemed like a good gig when I signed up. Pretty easy and the money was okay”, he says. “But it’s not fulfilling or challenging. I really feel like I could be doing…
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