Posts Tagged ‘Weather’
Alternate universe Denis Phillips advises Tampa Bay residents to freak out over Tropical Storm Nicole
As the east coast of Florida braces for impact from Tropical Storm Nicole, which may become a Category 1 hurricane before making landfall and is expected to have a relatively minor effect on the Tampa Bay Area, Bizarro Denis Phillips, a meteorologist from an alternate dimension, is advising residents to freak out. Denis Phillips, the…
Read MoreHurricane Tips for New Tampa Residents
Tampa Bay has experienced record growth in both population and cost of living this year. In light of that, here are some wonderful tips for the newcomers and carpetbaggers occupying Free Tampa. Do Not Evacuate. If you do evacuate, Hurricane Santa won’t bring you any guns. It’s just wind. Take a brisk stroll outside, or…
Read MoreBrewery Explosion Causes Beer to Rain Down on Certain Parts of Largo County
An explosion at the Hidden Sun Brewery in Downtown Largo momentarily caused beer to rain down over certain parts of the fourth largest city in Tampa Bay. “I was strolling with my baby on one of the 640 acres of park land in Largo when the rains started coming in,” said Shannon McBeel, a new…
Read MoreChannel 10 meteorologist Autumn Robertson leaving Tampa Bay Area
WTSP’s Autumn Robertson announced on her Facebook page today that she has accepted a position with a television station in Los Angeles. “Some big, personal news… ✨I’ll be joining the fantastic team at Spectrum News 1 in beautiful Los Angeles, California as their new weekday morning meteorologist.” – Autumn Robertson, via Facebook Robertson is originally…
Read MorePlant abuse up among Tampa Bay residents
The recent cold weather has exposed inhumane treatment by Tampa Bay residents. Tampa Bay plantologist, Shelbert Herring, noticed people covering their outdoor plants with blankets. Herring remarked “this is only the first step. We can’t forget about the pillows. What about also offering them some hot cocoa?” “Covering your plants with blankets without pillows can…
Read MoreOnce again, no hurricanes named ‘Clark’ this year
It’s bad enough that Clarks can’t walk into a souvenir shop and find a coffee mug or a bike license plate or a pair of Mickey Mouse ears with their name on it.
Read MoreNational Weather Service hires Kevin Cash to deal with Tropical Storm Eta
“Oh yeah, I know exactly what to do here. I got this.” – Tampa Bay Rays manager Kevin Cash
Read MoreCastor blames cold weather for bad mood
After numerous questions from local journalists badgering Mayor Castor as to why the collective feeling of the city has been so low recently, Castor had no choice but to answer as politically as possible.
Read MoreTAMPA NEWS FORCE – 7/29/18 – HEINEKEN BUCS WEATHER!
Check out our exclusive footage of the Bucs open practice, the Heineken Light boat coming to Ricks on the River, and a TNF weather report with our new intern Matty Bill$
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