Health
Covid 19 antibodies causing men to smell like strip club
As people around the country continue fighting the virus, many have developed antibodies which help protect them against the illness, however, as more men have attained the immuno-defense, the antibodies are coming with a strange side effect, releasing pheromones which resemble the interior of a gentlemen’s lounge. “My husband was coming home later and later…
Read MoreFurries making a comeback, thanks to COVID-19
It’s no secret that safe sex has been a bit dicey since the COVID pandemic began earlier this year. New York City health officials even went so far as to recommend residents practice COVID-safe sex, through use of a “wall” (aka a glory hole). The porn industry seems to be particularly at risk for COVID…
Read MoreGroup practices social distancing immediately after cookout
Attendees at Ronald and Debbie Flagsmore’s 4th of July cookout in Seminole Heights demonstrated exemplary social distancing practices, as soon as the event ended. “Well, gotta go”, said Cheryl Wooding, just as Debbie got up from her lawn chair and started to gather items to take back inside. “I don’t want to expose anyone unnecessarily…
Read MoreSt. Pete Man Allows People to Smell His Armpit as an Alternative Form of COVID Testing
“Well, the lines at the drive through state sanctioned testing facilities have gotten out of control, I wanted to give people another option.”
Read MoreSt Pete Woman Believes The Crystal in Her Purse Will End Corona Virus
Rachel Smith of Snell Isle holds a small round rose quartz in her hand, recalling how epic Burning Man was last year, and says she hopes that the Nevada Festival will resume in Fall of 2021. “It’s a really special crystal, a guy blessed it for me at Burning Man… well, on second thought, he…
Read MoreTampa Man Does Not Understand Why He Can Not Buy Drugs on Amazon Prime
“Damn, Besos! Makes me so mad… I’m out in public, but if there was any drywall nearby, you bet your ass I’d be smashing it!!”, exclaimed Kyle Melrose, a 27-year-old professional gamer from Tampa. Melrose explained that he’d been trying to procure illegal drugs off Amazon Prime since quarantine began. “I’ve been following all social…
Read MoreCooties numbers rise amongst pandemic
The disease originally thought only to be carried by girls and transmitted through actions such as hand holding, hugging or kissing in places like lunchroom cafeterias or playground tubes away from the judging eyes of other children, is more complex than ever imagined and has more sinister effects on the human body than originally thought.
Read MoreDad Ruptures Spleen Playing Original THPS, in Preparation For Remake
“I wAs JuSt tRyIn tO sHoW I wAs sTiLL hIp, wIthOUt bReAkiNg mY aCtuAl hiP!”
Read MoreWest Tampa man has greater appreciation of freedom, due to COVID-19
“I mean, I never served in the military. For that matter, I’ve never even been in any kind of situation where I might have to sacrifice anything for the sake of others. Now, after seeing examples set by various people around the country reacting to various quarantine restrictions, I’m so thankful for those who did make sacrifices, knowing that they did so with the intent of letting me do whatever I want!”
Read MoreQuarantined family might actually like each other
Special report from special free-lance correspondent Stephanie Powers (not that one) special on behalf of Tampa News Force When the “Stay at Home” orders were first placed, the thought of being quarantined with her husband and two children caused 39-year-old Jennifer McKinney of Weatchase to panic. “We don’t spend much time with each other, we…
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