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Lunar eclipse turns out to be nutsack

An account on twitter with over 5 million followers, popular for its news on lunar eclipse, incorrectly reported that a lunar eclipse was taking place last night, however it turned out that the users brother was dangling his nuts in front of his telescope, causing a silhouette. “I apologize to all my followers for the…

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Gisele spotted twerking at Club Prana

Gisele at Prana

Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback Tom Brady’s estranged wife supermodel Gisele Bündchen was reportedly seen twerking at popular Ybor City nightspot Club Prana last Saturday night. “Yeah, I was there and I saw the whole thing,” said frequent club goer Wayne Klumner of Tampa. “I was like, ‘whoa, who is this little hottie?’ and it was Gisele.…

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Homeless man turned out to be Jesus Christ

homeless jesus

Eye witnesses confirmed that a homeless man on 7th avenue in Ybor was in fact the son of God, Jesus Christ, the messiah. “This is exactly what I was afraid of.” Said Ed Edeneddy. “We were walking back from one of those loud bars where drinks are expensive and it cost a lot to sit…

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Tampa Officials Blame Elevated Party Levels on Influx of Douchebags


Tampa’s party scene has exploded tremendously since the beginning of the Covid-19 pandemic and scientist think they have figured out why. “Our fastest growing demographic in this city includes young men with access to their parents money,” said USF Professor of Urban Sociology, Dr. Wyatt Nhao. “These men lack critical thinking skills and are generally…

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Clearwater man keeps falling for moon prank


Dean Arrword of Clearwater is tired of being the victim of what he describes as a cruel prank. “Every time I see someone’s Facebook status that says, ‘OMG, go outside and look at the moon RIGHT NOW!’, I do it. I run right outside and look up,” he said. “And every time, it’s the same…

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UFO turns out to be anal wart


What was originally claimed to be an unidentified flying object is actually an anal wart upon further inspection of the alleged intergalactic photo. Ginny Masters, a 28-year-old girl scout leader had created a habit of waking up, and taking a picture of the first thing he’d see in his telescope. “I thought I had captured…

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Tampa man keeps dropping phone on his face

Phone face

Derek Kingsford of Tampa has developed the annoying nightly habit of lying in bed and dropping his phone on his face. “Yeah, it happens when I’m looking at stuff late at night”, he said. “I get drowsy and it falls out of my hand and lands on my face all the time. It’s really annoying”…

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St. Pete man disappointed with Tinder date

Tinder disappointment

Gregg Glizistky of St. Petersburg feels like he’s been deceived by a woman he matched with on the popular dating app, Tinder. “All these profiles are basically the same”, he said. “They say, ‘Hi, I like to go out to eat, enjoy live music, working out, watching sports and leisure activities and dogs and art.…

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Tampa man can’t shake nagging feeling he’s forgotten something

Lonely Drinker

A sales associate for Boost Mobile in Tampa is positive he’s forgotten something important pertaining to Christmas, but hasn’t been able to figure out what it might be. “It’s driving me crazy”, Joe Banjoe said, sitting alone at Hattrick’s in downtown Tampa. “I just can’t put my finger on what it is.” “I don’t think…

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