Posts Tagged ‘DeSantis ron’
DeSantis bans February
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis announced early this morning that effective immediately the month of February is illegal throughout the state. “The month of January will now be 45 days long and will be known as Janmaxuary and March will also be 45 days and shall be referred to as MarchUltra,” the Governor declared. “All the…
Read MoreTrump too smart to fall for DeShenantisanigans
As division widens between top Republican leaders former President Donald Trump and recently re-elected Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, tensions between the two men on a personal level are rising. At a recent “We’re In This Together Breakfast & Lunch But Definitely Not Brunch Because That’s Gay” event held at the prestigious Denny’s on Dale Mabry…
Read MoreDignitaries invited to be honored at TNF 2000th Article party
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis and Florida Senator Rick Scott have been invited by Tampa News Force to appear at the TNF 2000th Article Celebration / Free Beer Estate Sale Costume Contest, this Sunday, October 30th at Café Hey in Tampa for the sake of being presented with special meritorious achievement awards. The following was sent…
Read MoreDeSantis refuses to commit to type of coffee he wants to drink
In town this afternoon for lunch at Seasons 52 at the Westshore Plaza, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis was either unwilling or unable to tell a server if he wanted regular coffee or decaf. “I greeted him and asked if he’d like to start out with a beverage, the way I do with every customer,” said…
Read MoreDeSantis places restrictions on Kate Bush music
Due to being featured prominently in the popular Netflix series Stranger Things, the Kate Bush Song “Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God),” originally released in 1985, is a chart-topping hit again. “Yeah, and I’m sick of it,” said Florida Governor Ron DeSantis. “Damn song is everywhere, all the time.” For that reason, among…
Read MoreMan terrified to wear mask at DeSantis press conference
At a press conference earlier today in Nassau County where Florida Governor Ron DeSantis spoke about his ongoing plans for infrastructure improvements around the state, one man in attendance felt unsafe wearing a face mask. “I wanted to put it on, just to be careful because it was fairly crowded in there. I figured, ‘what’s…
Read MoreDeSantis not sure what to do about Juneteenth
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is experiencing anxiety in anticipation of the upcoming Juneteenth holiday, which takes place on June 19th and commemorates the anniversary date of the June 19, 1865, announcement of General Order No. 3 by Union Army general Gordon Granger, proclaiming freedom for enslaved people in Texas “This one is tricky,” he said. “How do…
Read MoreDeSantis unlocks another achievement on way to Tyrant Master Badge
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis took another huge step forward in his quest to earn the somewhat coveted Tyrant Master Badge by threatening the Special Olympics with $27 million in fines for 5,500 violations of state law for requiring proof of coronavirus vaccination for attendees or participants. The Special Olympics dropped the restriction and released a…
Read MoreDeSantis proposes re-animated corpse of Anita Bryant as replacement for Mickey Mouse
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is proposing a possible compromise in the ongoing strained relationship between his office and The Walt Disney Company. “Maybe there’s room for a quid pro quo,” he said. “Maybe if they do something, I’ll do something.” What he’s suggesting is that the entertainment conglomerate that operates Walt Disney World, arguably the…
Read MoreDeSantis scolds West Tampa Little Leaguer for wearing cup
A visibly annoyed Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis admonished a catcher for the West Tampa All-Stars on Saturday for wearing a protective cup prior to a Little League game. DeSantis was in town to throw out the ceremonial first pitch prior to the game, when he noticed a bulge in the pants of 8-year-old Adam Tweedler who was…
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