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Sacred Geometry just a bunch of gay numbers

By John Jacobs | March 16, 2023
Sacred Geometry

I went to check out all that sacred geometry bullsh*t that everybody is always talking about and it was just a bunch of stupid numbers. Who cares? So everything in life can be broken down mathematically and that’s where binary comes from, and all matter is just tiny particles floating around and colliding and this…

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Tampa man enjoys “The Final Countdown” unironically

By Clark Brooks | March 10, 2023
Final Countdown

Wilbur Bruceforce of Tampa has discovered a song from the 1980’s that he really likes; “The Final Countdown” by the band Europe from their 1986 album of the same name. “I found it by accident on Spotify. I don’t know, it’s just a good song,” he said. “It’s upbeat, it’s got that ’80s vibe. It…

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Tampa man wishes people would stop talking about homoerotic aspects of Top Gun movies while he’s trying to masturbate to Top Gun movies

By Clark Brooks | July 4, 2022
Top Gun

Tom Rowrf of Tampa wants people to stop interpreting certain imagery in the Top Gun series of films as homoerotic. “Seriously. Knock it off already. You are ruining this for me,” said Rowrf. “‘Top Gun’ and ‘Top Gun: Maverick’ are not gay and neither am I.” “I masturbate to them because I just really like…

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