Breaking News
Former celebs infest Tampa Bay Area to investigate crimes
Following the lead of formerly-briefly-relevant “reality TV star” and currently-active attention whore Dog the Bounty Hunter, who showed up at the home of homicide suspect Brian Laundrie in North Port Saturday, a glut of B, C and D-list “celebrities” have shown up in the Tampa Bay Area in an effort to find a second shot…
Read MoreIncompetent amateur sleuth turns out to be far worse grief counselor
In light of tragic breaking news that authorities have announced that they had found human remains in Wyoming consistent with a description of missing Florida woman Gabrielle Petito, a Tampa woman’s advice on dealing with grief is even worse than her stunningly inept detective skills. Amanda Manderson, a self-described “news junkie” has been emphatically declaring…
Read MoreGasworx to be powered by farts
The new Ybor City development consisting of apartments, dog tracks, and laser tag venues will be fueled strictly by human farts. “Yup, drop your pants and rip into this tube.” Said Randy a guy who told us he worked for the new multi-trillion dollar real estate deal. He walked us through a bunch of broken…
Read MoreBrady masters Milk Crate Challenge
Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback participated in, and successfully completed the Milk Crate Challenge on Tuesday at Copeland Park in Tampa. The trending fad consisting of stacking milk crates in a kind of pyramid/staircase configuration that people attempt (and usually fail) to climb and descend has resulted in videos on social media platforms with over 90…
Read MoreFour injured in bro-off in Seminole Heights
Four women suffered minor injuries and possible long-term psychological trauma at a Seminole Heights cafe yesterday morning, when they encountered a couple of bros bro-ing all over the place at The Independent on Florida Avenue. Ominous warning signs were present early when Dave and Richie, the bros in question, both wearing aggressively backward baseball caps…
Read MoreTampa Student Arrested After Fiery Fart Prank Burns School Down
A Tampa fifth grader is in trouble today after his annual first day of school prank went horribly wrong. “I saw that movie Dumb and Dumber over summer break and I wanted to light my fart on fire to impress everyone,” said Damian Lirimato who was shackled to a table at Hillsborough County Jail. “I…
Read MoreDelta Alpha Beta Variant Emerges at USF Tampa
“It came on so suddenly,” said Mike Penlip, a sophmore at USF in Tampa. “I had this overwhelming urge to binge the Joe Rogan Experience.” Penlip was your average hardworking USF student. He was studying Accounting with a minor in Finance. All of his extracurricular activities were academic, and he took school very seriously. He…
Read MoreCDC to employ Jackass tactics to get vax numbers up
With COVID cases spurred by the Delta variant on the rise in Florida, the Center for Disease Control is employing some unconventional methods to get more residents vaccinated. The original cast of MTV’s prank comedy show “Jackass” will re-unite and will travel around the state, tricking people into getting vaccinated. “We don’t know if this…
Read MoreTampa Mayor Jane Castor Revealed as Secret Buyer of the Legendary Wu-Tang Album
During a press conference today, Tampa Mayor Jane Castor accidentally let it slip that she purchased the legendary single copy of Wu-Tang Clans “The Wu – Once Upon a Time in Shaolin” that was previously owned by pharma bro Martin Shkreli. “I didn’t want to let it slip like that,” said Mayor Castor who was…
Read MoreBREAKING: Guy Has Sex
TAMPA, FL – During an exclusive interview with TNF, Brad Ormond, 28, disclosed that he had sex last night. The following is a transcript of that interview. SH – “So, Brad, you said you had something you wanted to get off your chest?” BO – “Yeah bro. You know that chick I was talking to…
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