Posts Tagged ‘USF’
Scientist discovers white people DO have a racist bone in their bodies
A scientist at the University of South Florida has determined that in spite of years and years of claims to the contrary, white people actually do have a racist bone in their bodies. “The as-yet unnamed newly discovered bone, joining the 206 previously known, can be found in the skull but is not part of…
Read MoreDeSantis dedicates new science facility at USF
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis visited the Tampa campus of the University of South Florida to attend the dedication ceremony for the new Dennis Nedry Science Center. “Here’s a man who dedicated his life to science, a true innovator in the fields of computer programming, cyber security and shaving cream containers, who never lost sight of…
Read MoreDelta Alpha Beta Variant Emerges at USF Tampa
“It came on so suddenly,” said Mike Penlip, a sophmore at USF in Tampa. “I had this overwhelming urge to binge the Joe Rogan Experience.” Penlip was your average hardworking USF student. He was studying Accounting with a minor in Finance. All of his extracurricular activities were academic, and he took school very seriously. He…
Read MoreQUIZ: Where should I go to college?
Here at Tampa News Force, we support people furthering their education. And while we can’t pull any strings and get you into the college of your choice, we can help you determine which of Florida’s many excellent institutes of higher learning might be the best fit for you. How’s that? Pretty good, right? You’re welcome.…
Read MoreTampa man chagrined after mocking statue of beloved local icon
Ted Chiddleston of Seminole Heights is feeling highly embarrassed and ashamed of himself after making snide remarks about a statue in downtown Tampa. He was traveling west on Brorein Street, heading toward Bayshore Boulevard when he stopped at a traffic light at the intersection of Florida Avenue. As he was waiting for the light to…
Read MoreUSF plays in unsanctioned bowl game
The USF Bulls, who went 1-8 (0-7 in the American Athletic Conference) this year played in a bowl game yesterday to conclude head coach Jeff Scott’s first season at the helm of the program. “Sure, our record rendered us ineligible for consideration for any recognized, sanctioned holiday bowl games,” said Scott. “But if there’s anything…
Read MoreResearch determines Ybor’s 7th Avenue comprised mostly of bodily fluids
An exhaustive study by research scientists and grad students from the University of South Florida has determined that 7th Avenue (La Septima), Ybor City’s main thoroughfare, is made up mostly of bodily fluids. “To be clear, we’re talking about the physical make-up of the street itself”, says Margot Hydrocloset, lead USF researcher from her team’s…
Read MoreScientists ignoring astronomer’s discovery
“It’s an asteroid, roughly the size of Africa”, he says. “The trajectory is still undetermined but it is an imminent threat to earth.”
Read MoreTampa medical call center rewards employee bravery with jeans day all week.
It was announced on Monday of this week that employees will be allowed to wear jeans all week long as a reward for their bravery and dedication.
Read MoreUSF to offer course on Misogyny
In an effort to help young men hate women “correctly”, University of South Florida is offering a course in Misogyny. “The political climate in the past few years has made it not only easier but necessary to hate women, so a lot of young fellas are already conditioned and proficient,” says professor Jay Dribbler. “But…
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