Posts Tagged ‘Tampa Bay Rays’
St. Pete sports fan going broke on championship merch
Upon ordering the brand-new official NFC Championship t-shirt and cap commemorating the Bucs advancing to Super Bowl LV, Tanya Krussp of St. Petersburg realizes she has spent a small fortune on championship merchandise lately. “I’m strictly a die-hard Tampa Bay fan. I only care about my teams”, she said. “But every time you turn around…
Read MoreKevin Cash tries to remove Brady from Bucs game
During the second quarter of todays game between the Atlanta Falcons and Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Tampa Bay Rays manager Kevin Cash jumped from the stands and ran out on the field in an effort to pull quarterback Tom Brady out of the game. “That’s enough! Get him outta there!”, he was heard yelling. “Gabbert, warm…
Read MoreTampa Bay Rays to Trade Blake Snell for World-Renowned Belly Itcher
In a startling turn of events, the management of the Tampa Bay Rays has decided to trade away their star pitcher from last season, Blake Snell, 28. In return, fans can expect to see a new starting player, Mikey O’Leary, a wily upstart from an unnamed farm team out of Dubuque, Iowa. When asked if…
Read MoreSports stuff happening somewhere in Florida
Not everyone is a die-hard sports fan or competition-crazed enthusiast. Nonetheless, it feels good to be up on the latest news events. That’s why I’m here to inform you that there has been word that sports stuff is going on… or it did go on recently. It’s been confirmed that something sports related is/was just…
Read MoreRays capture AL pennant; will face (insert TBA team name here) in World Series!
The Tampa Bay Rays beat the Houston Astros 4-2 in Game 7 of the 2020 American League Championship Series tonight in San Diego, California, to earn the second World Series berth in franchise history. I asked Rays outfielder and ALCS Most Valuable Player Randy Arozarena if the Rays were inspired to greatness by playing in…
Read MoreTampa Man Discovers Long Lost Tropicana Field
Fountain of Youth, Atlantis, Tropicana Field; Mythological destinations that have long been sought after by generations of explorers. Now, thanks to one such explorer, we rewrite the history books. Over the weekend the Legend of Tropicana Field has gone from gorilla in the mist to a pin on Waze, all thanks to Clive Raines. It…
Read MoreTNF ALCS preview: Rays-Astros
After dispatching the vile New York Yankees 3-2 in the Amercian League Division Series, the next obstacle standing in the way of the Tampa Bay Rays righteous quest for World Series glory is the only professional sports team to benefit from COVID-19, the Houston Astros. The 7-game series begins with the first pitch at 7:37pm…
Read MoreTNF ALDS preview: Rays-Yankees
I just woke up, hungover from Stanley Cup celebrations last week. I’m pretty sure I was on a boat captained by someone who didn’t speak English and I might have helped tear down a light pole outside of Amalie Arena. It’s kinda fuzzy. Anyway, I’ve been told by the big bosses upstairs that now that…
Read MoreGhost of 2019 Lightning issues warning to Rays
As the Tampa Bay Rays prepare to open their first-round playoff series against the Toronto Blue Jays tomorrow, they were visited by an unexpected and uninvited guest at their workout at Tropicana Field earlier today: the ghost of the 2019 Tampa Bay Lightning. “Heeeeeed my waaaarning; the number one seeeed means nothing in the poooooost…
Read MoreRays passive-aggressively clinch playoff berth
With a sweep of the Orioles in a doubleheader in Baltimore yesterday, the Tampa Bay Rays secured a spot in the postseason, within a matter of minutes of the Tampa Bay Lightning earning their way into the Stanley Cup Final against the Dallas Stars with an overtime win over the New York Islanders. “Yeah, that’s…
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