Posts Tagged ‘Tom Brady’
Brady honed White House comedy chops at Tampa Bay open mics
“What a great experience”, said Brady. “Really effective means of practicing. Nobody was there so there was no pressure. And some, not all, of the comics were very supportive and helpful. I’ll definitely do this again when we win next year’s Super Bowl, Ooops, I mean ‘IF’ we win next year! Ha ha!”
Read MoreTampa Bay sports makes man orgasm
Benny Hudgins of Valrico climaxed thinking about Tampa’s current sports rosters, causing him to have an epiphany that the city can make him come more than his significant other. “I was sitting in my recliner chair watching game 1 of the Stanley Cup playoffs, and I found myself getting sexually aroused at the thought of…
Read MoreTom Brady purchases new residence in Tampa
Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback Tom Brady has purchased a new home in the Robles Park neighborhood of Tampa. “Since I signed my contract extension and I’m going to be here a while, I figured it was time to put down some more permanent roots,” Brady said. “Staying at Jeter’s place has been nice; life is…
Read MoreTom Brady Fulfills Child’s Dream of Beating Him with a Bat
During one of his many unmasked visits to a local children’s hospital, Tom Brady surprised a sick seven-year-old boy by fulfilling his wish of beating the Tampa Bay Buccaneers star quarterback with an aluminum bat. “I was all out of footballs and he wanted me to sign his bat,” said a bruised-up Brady. The seven-time…
Read MoreBucs sign Brady’s celebration attendant to contract extension
The world champion Tampa Bay Buccaneers have signed Boof Noosler to a one-year contract extension, following today’s celebratory boat parade. Noosler, whose job consists entirely of making sure quarterback Tom Brady doesn’t fall down and hurt himself after drinking too much tequila, has been deemed “absolutely essential” by general manager Jason Licht. “if there’s one…
Read MoreTampa Officially Renames Cuban Sandwich ‘The Tom Brady Meat Sandwich’
Following a decisive victory at Sunday’s Super Bowl, Tampa Mayor Jane Castor announced that the famous Tampa Cuban Sandwich will officially be named ‘The Tom Brady Meat Sandwich’. “We want to commemorate this momentous occasion by making some changes to the Cuban Sandwich,” said Mayor Castor during a press conference at Café Hey, a small…
Read MoreTNF Super Bowl LV Prediction Preview: Today will be the most Tampa day in the history of Tampa
We’re either going to celebrate or whatever the opposite of celebrate is, but no matter what, tonight Tampa is a verb as well as a noun and we are going to Tampa like we have never Tampa’d before.
Read MoreTom Brady Tests Positive
“We just received Tom’s test results,” said Dr. Dilgore Robinson, who was waving a clipboard in the air revealing the test results.
Read MoreBUCS! booked for Ruth Eckerd Hall
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers have signed an agreement to adapt their 2020 season into a multi-media musical theatre presentation to be performed at Ruth Eckerd Hall in Clearwater. “We’re so excited to bring the spectacular magic and pageantry of this incredible Tampa Bay Buccaneers football season to the stage”, said Bobby Rossi, CPO/Executive Vice President…
Read MoreTNF NFC CHMPSHP PRVW
Today, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers will face the Green Bay Packers at Lambeau Field in Wisconsin for the right to advance to Super Bowl LV. It’s been a really long time since Tampa Bay sports fans have had a team on the verge of achieving greatness, unless you count the Lightning winning the Stanley Cup…
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