Tampa News Force
Breaking News
Governor’s Office Urges Citizens to Remain Calm as Gas Overage Persists
How are you dealing with all this excess gas lying around? ⛽️
DeSantis to Personally Investigate Latest Assassination Attempt on Trump
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis will be conducting his own investigation regarding the attempted assassination of former President Trump at the Republican presidential nominee’s golf club…
Sports
Yankees Fan Invited to Spring Training
When the defending American League But Not World Champion New York Yankees report to Tampa for spring training in February, they’ll be joined by self-appointed…
NFL Officially Designates New Position
After years of contributions from lovable big guys, the National Football League (NFL) has designated Lovable Big Guy (LGB) an official position effective immediately. A template perfected by William “Refrigerator” Perry of the Chicago Bears in 1985 of oversized defensive linemen being used in certain offensive situations has been adapted by various teams over the…
Arts and Entertainment
Modern Day DaVinci Spends 16 Seconds On Portrait’s Smile
You have to admire the attention to detail! 🎨🖼️
Government
Florida Outlaws Ranting in Your Car Without Recording It and Putting It on the Internet
It’s about time the government got involved in this.
Local and Community
Tampa Couple Makes Mashed Potatoes for Trunksgiving
Bob and Carol Tednalice of Tampa, inspired by how much fun they had this year with their first time participating in Trunk-or-Treat, the Halloween tradition where participants decorate their cars’ trunks with Halloween themes and pass out candy to children, are hoping to continue the fun with Trunksgiving. “We had heard of Trunk-or-Treat but didn’t…
The Tampa Bay Vipers, a currently retired XFL team, were caught playing a game of football in their old home location of Raymond James Stadium at 3 am this morning, when a security guard on his rounds stumbled upon the event. “They were all up and playing a full-on game of football with each other…
US Senator Rick Scott of Florida will be replacing Winter the Dolphin on a temporary basis at the Clearwater Marine Aquarium. “Winter was beloved by children everywhere, many of whom are visiting Florida for the holidays,” said Scott. “And since her unfortunate and untimely passing, probably at the hands of Joe Biden… although I have…
TAMPA, FL — Last Monday, USF Football announced that they had fired Defensive Coordinator Glenn Spencer. Less than 24 hours later, they announced his replacement. “It is my pleasure to announce the hiring of my neighbor, Ben Faithfullerson, as Defensive Coordinator,” Head Coach Jeff Scott declared in his weekly press conference. Not much is known…
It’s holiday season once again, when you disappoint your loved ones with the things you buy for them instead of your actions and life choices, like the rest of the time. In an ultimately futile effort to minimize the damage you’re going to incur/cause, we proudly present the 2021 edition of the Tampa News Force…
Danny Gwishtner of Tampa has drawn the ire of his Town and Country neighbors for setting off fireworks in his backyard on Thanksgiving for some reason. “I couldn’t figure out what the hell he was doing”, said Kevin Hormuz who lives directly next door. “So that was the exact question I asked him: ‘what the…
The holiday season kicks into full gear officially today, with it being Thanksgiving. That means various establishments and institutions will be launching their annual food drives to benefit the less fortunate. You’re a kind and compassionate person who wants to help and we want to help you in helping others. We’re all here to helpity…
Hacks’ Comedy Club, famous for glorifying the iconic comedy stylings of Buddy Hacket, has opened a new location at the North East wall of the Westshore mall food court. “We love Buddy Hacket, he’s our favorite comedian over here!” Said Owner, Mitch Freeman. “He invented comedy! So we figure, why not go with what works?…
A resident in Westchase is facing possible fines from his homeowners association (HOA) for displaying holiday lights too early but that HOA is making sure that people know that there are restrictions and severe penalties for violating those restrictions that extend beyond pretty lights. The letter from the Westchase Community Association to Mark Mofflee, the…
Florida Senator Rick Scott has announced that the primary entrée for his annual Thanksgiving dinner celebration will be barbecued spare ribs from Tampa Bay Buccaneers tight end Rob Gronkowski. “Nummy nummy”, slobbered Scott. Gronkowski suffered multiple fractured ribs, along with a punctured lung, in the Bucs 34-24 loss to the Los Angeles Rams on September…
Some of you may have asked yourself, “Why are some street lights in my neighborhood blue while others are the standard white?” So you Google it and it explains it’s because there are faulty bulbs and when they go wrong, they turn blue, and if you call TECO they will come out and replace the…