Tampa News Force
Plato’s Closet announces “coming out” specials
The thrift clothing franchise Plato’s Closet has announced that all stores will now begin offering special discounts if you’re willing to announce to the world that you’re homosexual at one of their stores as part of an online promotion. If you stand in front of the counter, and announce on their local branch’s FaceBook Live…
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Breaking News
Controversy surrounding statue of brainless Kennedy in convertible on Kennedy Blvd
Conspiracy theory from the art world!
Sports
Rays City Connect Uniforms Ranked Greatest Achievement in Franchise History
Are you planning to get some of this new gear?
Arts and Entertainment
Busch Gardens Tampa announces birth of endangered orangutan, now it’s all they talk about
Are you excited to meet the new baby? 🦧
Government
Florida Women to Legally Be Considered Property
Hey fellas, are you looking to get one of these things? 👶
Local and Community
Community Center Offers BYOB
Check out all the great and inexpensive programs this place offers! 🧘🧘♀️🧘♂️
Ybor Tattoo Shop on 7th – Hillsborough County – Wednesday, 5.30.2019 While on a trip to Ybor City to promote hurricane preparedness, Senator Rick Scott decided to get inked by legendary tattoo artist, MarcoEllis Phillifes. “When he came into my shop, I saw a beautiful canvas,” said Phillifes, a third-generation tattoo artist from Ybor City.…
Tampa Museum of Art – Hillsborough County – Wednesday, 5.29.19 The Tampa Art Museum located in Downtown Tampa will now be featuring “Gay Prostitute Night” which is being listed as an event, however it’s also listed as an art piece, leaving museum goers confused. The official email released to Tampa Art Museum subscribers stated, “As…
Suntrust Building – Hillsborough County – Tuesday, 5.28.19 An 8th grader has been taken into custody after hijacking the Suntrust lighting system and displaying a swastika on the roof of the Suntrust building. “I thought it would be funny!” Said the 8th grader who will remain anonymous. “Sometimes you scratch one in your notebook or…
Doing cocaine in Tampa is like visiting Disney when in Orlando. If you’re on the search for the perfect place to do cocaine while hanging out in the Tampa Bay area, we’ve got you covered! 5. MacDinton’s This college bar on South Howard has the perfect bathrooms to do cocaine in, because not only are…
Downtown Tampa – Hillsborough County – Sunday, 5.26.2019 The National Organization of Smelling Enforcement (NOSE) has ranked Tampa among the best smelling cities in the world. “Once your nostrils get accustomed to the humidity, the things you can smell in this town are unbelievable,” said NOSE Official City Sniffer, Laura Grenie. “I can count all…
Tampa Neighborhood Park – Hillsborough County – Saturday, 5.25.2019 A neighborhood police BBQ turned up the heat to 11 today after one of the officers manning the grill was accused of giving most of the food to homeless people. “We told them last night to clear out the park so we could set up for…
Tampa is one of the top destinations in the entire world, and according to a recent internal survey, 80% of Tampa likes to get laid. So today we are counting down the best places to get it! 5. Beach People love having sex on the beach! Trust me! Not only do I see it, and…
Upper-West Soho – Hillsborough County – Thursday, 5.23.19 A new tanning salon in Hyde Park has opened featuring no roof, leaving guests exposed to the natural sun. Some are calling it a scam, others are calling it genius. The creators have called it “Soho Natural Tan.” It’s a vintage two-story brothel that’s converted into an…
Rick Scott Tampa Office Branch – Hillsborough County – Thursday, 5.22.2019 Let me be the first to admit that I have not completed watching the Game of Thrones (GOT) series, but I have made it halfway through season six and (SPOILER ALERT) Senator Rick Scott, who made his millions defrauding Medicare and then in turn…
You’re young, wealthy, bored and a sociopath. Of course you’re going to want to hunt human beings as prey. But where are the best places in Tampa Bay to engage in such a pursuit? Scroll down, dummy; here is a list of the five best. (NOTE: This is written with the assumption that you have…