Tampa News Force
Top Headlines
Breaking News
Controversy surrounding statue of brainless Kennedy in convertible on Kennedy Blvd
Conspiracy theory from the art world!
Sports
NFL Approves Enhanced Head Injury Prevention Measure
Something that makes players safe AND more adorable sounds pretty good 🏈
Arts and Entertainment
Busch Gardens Tampa announces birth of endangered orangutan, now it’s all they talk about
Are you excited to meet the new baby? 🦧
Government
Florida Women to Legally Be Considered Property
Hey fellas, are you looking to get one of these things? 👶
Local and Community
Babies Prohibited from Crying on Water Street
At least there’s one place in town you can go and enjoy peace and quiet 👶
“It’s an asteroid, roughly the size of Africa”, he says. “The trajectory is still undetermined but it is an imminent threat to earth.”
“Just Kidding” Bernie said, running out of a metro bathroom trying to catch a train.
“What about me?” Said IG model SteffXOXO69<3
Citing the fact that the next NFL season will be played exclusively through an advanced VR version of Madden NFL on a couple PS5’s linked together with a LAN cable, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers unveiled their newest uniforms with the surprise addition assless pants. “The latest VR technology requires electrodes to be placed all over…
“The funeral is an extremely important part of dealing with death”, says funeral director Milton Feeny. “An even more important part of pretending to be dead, as it turns out.”
“It’s really been a struggle for us,” said Cindy Mae Watkins, pastry chef by day and reasonable adult by night. “We keep hoping and praying for him to at least get a cough and a fever. Yet he persists. It’s as though there’s no God at all.”
While we’re waiting for a nice 4pm dinner of fish with almonds on it and jello with carrot shavings in it, let’s look at the news.
While investigating an unrelated news tip, Tampa News Force discovered a secret group of doctors who are attempting to cure COVID-19 patients by forcing them to perform sexual acts with people of the same gender. “While everyone has been practicing social distancing, we have found same gender unions have experienced lower COVID-19 infection rates,” said…
There are too many good things on TV, but they are not all good if you know what I mean. Thankfully, we put together this binge worthy video list for your entertainment. Number 5 – Limp Bizkit Live At Helfest 2018 Limp Bizkit has performed at least a dozen shows throughout their lengthy career, and…
“People see me on the street and they shout, ‘you killed your husband!’ And I smile and wave because I think, ‘Wow, they know me from the TV! How cool!’”