Breaking News
Controversy surrounding statue of brainless Kennedy in convertible on Kennedy Blvd
Conspiracy theory from the art world!
Sports
NFL Approves Enhanced Head Injury Prevention Measure
Something that makes players safe AND more adorable sounds pretty good 🏈
Arts and Entertainment
Busch Gardens Tampa announces birth of endangered orangutan, now it’s all they talk about
Are you excited to meet the new baby? 🦧
Government
Tampa to Replace Speed Limit Signs with Thumbs-Up Emoji
Slow down, speed up, whatever you want to do is fine!
Local and Community
Babies Prohibited from Crying on Water Street
At least there’s one place in town you can go and enjoy peace and quiet 👶
Just in time for the arrival of vacationing tourists from up north, the Tampa Bay Area has a brand new amusement attraction; “Escalation: The Wonder Of Escalation!” at Clearwater’s Countryside Mall. Located between Zales Jewelers and the Tampa Bay Skating Academy, the attraction consists of two escalators, one that goes up from the ground level…
The land between Naples and Fort Lauderdale in the center of Florida known as “the Everglades” will now become Chip Denver’s “World’s Largest Waterpark,” a new theme park developed by eccentric tech billionaire Chip Denver, who’s invested $6 billion into developing the land once designated as a national park. Denver bought the land from the…
In an attempt to prevent his secret from getting out, the principal of East Tampa High School convinced a student he was having sexual relations with, to become a school shooter. “I had to influence her into developing violent tendencies and unsolvable anger issues against her classmates and the entire school system as a whole,…
In an attempt to congratulate the Tampa Bay Rays on their playoff achievement, local business owner Manny Plaqueiao spent much of his weekend digging through his garage looking for his old Rays memorabilia to hang up around his place of business. “I went to one game this year when they had the $2 tickets,” said…
Even though Halloween is still weeks away, this season’s least popular costume has already been determined: Sexy Rick Scott. The costume, consisting of a rubber pinhead mask with light-up googly eyes and a lower jaw that constantly hangs open, approximating the former Florida governor’s ‘smile’ also includes a white shirt, red tie, charcoal gray suit…
The Seminole Hard Rock Casino will now be accepting blood as a substitute for American currency when it comes to repaying debts and casino loans. “There are many times where patrons will have run out of money, however they’d like to continue gamble. We want to make our guests happy, so we let them take…
Some Tampa Bay area residents have been horrified to find out that they have been sending their senior citizen parents to live out the rest of their lives in a haunted house. “This is completely unacceptable,” says Carolyn Moonstock of Oldsmar. “We love our parents. They’ve worked hard all their lives and shouldn’t be spending…
One day after the presentation of Creative Loafing’s 2019 Best of the Bay Awards, the work on making the nomination and voting processes even more glitch-ridden and frustrating next year has already begun. “It’s just like sports; the day after the Super Bowl is when you start working on next season,” says Chip Zoomer, Creative…
Tampa Business owner Led Wahtah, is upset after spending $75,000 on online marketing for a failed bid to secure a coveted Creative Loafing ‘Best of the Bay 2019’ award. “This was our first year in business and our consultants told us to target some Facebook ads, get that CL ‘Best of the Bay 2019’ sticker…
A hurricane party in Pinellas Park ended abruptly when a tornado ripped through the house, causing hundreds of dollars worth of damage. Frank “Rico” Turner is the owner of the house hit by the cyclone, and was proud to be host of a party that got hit by a Tornado. “We were celebrating the fact…