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Breaking News
Controversy surrounding statue of brainless Kennedy in convertible on Kennedy Blvd
Conspiracy theory from the art world!
Sports
Tampa News Force Sports Analysts Break Down Lightning’s Loss to Calgary on “Pride Night”
Who’s right? Who’s wrong? 🏒🥅🌈
Arts and Entertainment
Busch Gardens Tampa announces birth of endangered orangutan, now it’s all they talk about
Are you excited to meet the new baby? 🦧
Government
Tampa to Replace Speed Limit Signs with Thumbs-Up Emoji
Slow down, speed up, whatever you want to do is fine!
Florida Prison Guard Unable to Afford Rent, Commits Crime to Sleep in Prison
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Local and Community
Babies Prohibited from Crying on Water Street
At least there’s one place in town you can go and enjoy peace and quiet 👶
Tampa, FL– A newly-elected mayor has banned fireworks in Tampa for the foreseeable future. The mayor, simply named “Mr. Ruffins,” has decreed that fireworks are a scourge on society and will not be tolerated in any form. Mr. Ruffins held a press conference in front of more than 300 Tampa Bay residents (mostly dogs) who…
Before inevitably rotting in hell, Ghislaine Maxwell revealed while in federal custody, that her former confidant and notoriously dead billionaire, Jeff Epstein, was an avid reader of Tampa News Force. “He would get notifications on his phone every time an article was posted,” Maxwell cried in the official audio of her interrogation. “We would sit…
An incredible winner-take-all, to-the-death, royal rumble, no-holds-barred, melee-style fight between Freedom and Responsibility will take place at the Festival Hall located on the Florida State Fairgrounds just east of Tampa, tomorrow evening. Both opponents are heavily invested in the outcome and spoke to the media at a weigh-in ceremony at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel…
Wilbur Harrington departed from Philippe Park April 29th at 9 am. It was a beautiful 72 degrees. Since there was an 8 mph breeze from the East, he decided to head right into the breeze and go East 2 miles to Oldsmar. He paddled 30 minutes, and he was there. He decided to get out…
The inaugural Seminole Heights Bat Soup Festival is scheduled to take place on July 19th conditions pending the Seminole Garden Center park remains open. Many vendors have already dropped out due to the virus, but thirteen of the original thirty five bat soup purveyors are still committed to the event. “It’s such a shame all…
The Tampa Bay Rays had a unit of sunshine cast upon them in the form of good news. With the fate of the entire baseball season in doubt amid negotiations between the millionaire players and billionaire owners, The MLB and MLB Players Association have dugout an agreement. Despite heated arguments, a worldwide pandemic, and their…
Pete’s Puttering Putt-Putts, a luxury golf cart dealership in Largo would like the general public to know that they no longer do any business whatsoever with customers who reside in The Villages. “We’d like people to know that,” says Pete Putterman, owner and CEO. “But it isn’t true. Are you kidding? That’s the source of…
A student at University of Tampa has taken it upon herself to continue making her family’s gatherings unpleasant. Despite being quarantined in Florida, thousands of miles from her parents’ house in Topeka, Kansas, Brittani Meyerson is determined to give her father a “like, wild ass headache. Maybe even, like, a stroke?” Meyerson, a junior majoring…
“Well, the lines at the drive through state sanctioned testing facilities have gotten out of control, I wanted to give people another option.”
“I’m annoyed,” says artist Krystov Malig. “I’m also insulted.”