Tampa News Force
Top Headlines
Breaking News
Controversy surrounding statue of brainless Kennedy in convertible on Kennedy Blvd
Conspiracy theory from the art world!
Sports
NFL Approves Enhanced Head Injury Prevention Measure
Something that makes players safe AND more adorable sounds pretty good 🏈
Arts and Entertainment
Busch Gardens Tampa announces birth of endangered orangutan, now it’s all they talk about
Are you excited to meet the new baby? 🦧
Government
Florida Women to Legally Be Considered Property
Hey fellas, are you looking to get one of these things? 👶
Local and Community
Babies Prohibited from Crying on Water Street
At least there’s one place in town you can go and enjoy peace and quiet 👶
A magical talking dragon landed on the basketball courts located in Perry Harvey Sr. Park on Sunday, then began to explain the concept of magic to all onlookers. “You see, infinite worlds live outside of yours and while you may not be conscious of them at this moment, we are conscious of your existence and…
A group of women gathered outside of Tampa city hall this afternoon to make themselves heard on an issue that’s very important to them. Identifying themselves as Women Not Named Karen Who Resent Being Called Karen (WNNKWRBCK), they want the public to know that they’re not ashamed of their behavior during a spate of recent…
Although it’s been over a year since the song, “Old Town Road” by Lil Nas X featuring Billy Ray Cyrus came out, it has been brought up again as a shining example for some in the Black Lives Matter movement. This has some animals rights groups and activists, including St Pete Musician Noel Rochford, in…
During a recent press conference, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis once again refused a request by the National Association of the Deaf to have an interpreter present in favor of delivering some sign language of his own. “For those who can’t hear my words or read my lips, I have two words for you,” said DeSantis…
Jason Schnurk, a licensed therapist who works with the Crisis Center of Tampa Bay as a counselor to people contemplating suicide, has decided he’s not going to return calls on Friday afternoons. “You know what? It’s FriYAY, it’s TGIF, I’m ready to get out of here and go to Applebee’s for Happy Hour and Riblets,…
Hillsborough County will be the first district in Tampa to erect “infection stations,” tents where volunteers will help healthy citizens become infected with the Coronavirus in an attempt to beat the illness through unified populous infection. “You remember when you were a kid and your parents would have you spend the night with the kid…
Galen Scroggins of Tampa has been relieved of his duties as a driver for the Uber Eats food delivery service after repeatedly ignoring the most efficient routes to customers addresses suggested by the GPS on his phone. “CNN, MSNBC, CBS, GPS. All of those networks are nothing but liberal propaganda machines and all they do…
Resident of Pinellas County, Roy Jackson, is claiming that his Covid mask turned him into a homosexual after trying to justify his rationalization through, “amateur science.” “I’m an amateur scientist” Jackson said. “See, humans release pheromones and when your forced to breathe in your own pheromones all day you start to live the thing you…
Some employees of Associated Office Application Associates in downtown Tampa received a vocabulary lesson along with an unpleasant surprise at their weekly all-staff meeting. CEO Gary Simmons opened the meeting in an unusual manner, setting many employees on edge immediately. “You know, English is a very funny language. Well, not so much funny as unusual.…
Today, Santa Claus was pronounced dead while vacationing in Florida. Santa was admitted to Florida Beachside General Hospital citing breathing complaints a few days ago. Florida health officials confirmed that Santa contracted the COVID-19 virus after partying on a boat with some Trump supporters. “Santa was challenged to a number of drinking games while on…