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Breaking News
Controversy surrounding statue of brainless Kennedy in convertible on Kennedy Blvd
Conspiracy theory from the art world!
Sports
NFL Approves Enhanced Head Injury Prevention Measure
Something that makes players safe AND more adorable sounds pretty good 🏈
Arts and Entertainment
Busch Gardens Tampa announces birth of endangered orangutan, now it’s all they talk about
Are you excited to meet the new baby? 🦧
Government
Tampa to Replace Speed Limit Signs with Thumbs-Up Emoji
Slow down, speed up, whatever you want to do is fine!
Florida Prison Guard Unable to Afford Rent, Commits Crime to Sleep in Prison
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Local and Community
Babies Prohibited from Crying on Water Street
At least there’s one place in town you can go and enjoy peace and quiet 👶
Tampa City Council – Hillsborough County – Thursday, 7.18.19 During a livestream of a recent meeting between the Hillsborough County Board of County Commissioners, elected official Stacy White was captured in the moment eating his own used tampon. “I swear I thought they said that we were on pause and that nothing was being broadcasted,”…
Florida Avenue – Hillsborough County – Wednesday, 7.17.19 Marco Scrivener, a driver for made-up wholesale food distributor Sunnysco, was accosted in Seminole Heights Monday afternoon. “I was at a red light and this fella came up to the truck and started shouting an order at me,” Scrivener said. “The trailer has a big picture of…
Tampa Bay Downs – Hillsborough County – Tuesday, 7.16.19 Sunday, June 30th marked the Third Annual Tampa Bay Corgi Races at the Tampa Bay Downs. This event replaces horses with corgis for an all-out 50 yard-sprint for the furry competitors to crown the ‘Fastest Corgi in Tampa.’ Wet-nosed woofles gathered from all around the Tampa Bay…
Nebraska Avenue – Hillsborough County – Tuesday, 7.16.19 In a landmark decision, the Tampa City Council passed a bill legalizing prostitution on Nebraska Avenue. In a 5-4 vote, it is now legal to peddle sexual favors on the street of Nebraska Avenue, 24-hours a day. “It was just a logical move.” Said city council chairman,…
The Loftvue – Hillsborough County – Monday, 7.15.19 After waking up and smoking pot, Democrat Eustace Mercado fixed himself up a microwaved breakfast biscuit and began watching CNN on his television. “I work just enough hours a week to afford rent, cable and enough pot to keep me in this endless cycle,” said Mercado who…
With the political climate being what it is, a sure fire way to find yourself in a scandal is to have old footage resurface showing insensitive or inappropriate behavior. That is exactly the situation Sen. Rick Scott has found himself in after old photos have been brought to light. The photos in question show the…
Florida Detention Center – Hillsborough County – 7.13.19 During a recent tour of a for-profit facility that houses detained migrant children, Florida Senator Marco Rubio praised the facilities bathroom. “After hearing about the awful conditions these children have been kept in, I wanted to see what all the fuss was about,” Rubio said while sipping…
Tampa City Hall – Hillsborough County – Friday, 7.12.19 Lesbian Mayor magazine recently named Tampa’s own Jane Castor as the hottest mayor in the country. The competition was done on an instagram voting system, where users would “like” pictures of the lesbian mayor candidates, and after a 3-week runoff, Jane Castor narrowly beat Lori Lightfoot…
Water Street Tampa – Hillsborough County – Thursday, 7.11.19 The Tampa Water street development got a new update as there will now be plans to erect a dubstep hall of fame which will be attached to the new USF medical building. The bid for the addition came in late Wednesday evening after Tampa won the…
Tampa General Hospital – Hillsborough County – Thursday, 7.11.19 A local Tampa man was scared today after reading on a fake news website that ‘Medicare for All’ would make him poor. “I got that internet thing as part of a package deal with my cable company,” said Doug Barr, “I only trust what my TV…